Is it possible to have it both ways?

I've been thinking a lot about the both/and of things. Ever since I learned about this concept a few years ago, it keeps getting more and more relevant. Also called dialectics, the both/and allows us to hold space for more than one thing to be true at one time, even if it seems like they might be opposed to each other. Without taking anything away from that other thing. 

Being excited about the ceasefire, *and* knowing that it's just the first of many steps toward achieving Palestinian liberation.

Grieving the loss of a loved one, while also honoring that the relationship with that person was often challenging and painful.

Dreading and fearing the next 4 years and also finding refuge and hope in community, relationships, and love.

Having suffering and fear because of my life experiences, and you having suffering and fear because of your life experiences.

It can be so tempting to want it only one way. That's how our society's dominant culture wants us to feel. Us or them. Me or you. 

So now, with so much uncertainty and polarization, it's even more vital for us to remember the both/and. This does *not* mean that we condone or apologize for the harmful behavior of others. What it *can* do is introduce a way for us to compassionately navigate our own complex emotions, and it can also provide a starting point for conversations to help us better understand each other.

Where are some places that you can bring the 'both/and' into your life?